August 22, 2005

Top 20 Reasons Why Chocolate Is Better Than Sex

1. You can GET chocolate.

2. “If you love me you’ll swallow that” has real
meaning with chocolate.

3. Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft.

4. You can safely have chocolate while you are
driving.

5. You can make chocolate last as long as you
want it to.

6. You can have chocolate even in front of your
mother.

7. If you bite the nuts too hard the chocolate won’t
mind.

8. Two people of the same sex can have chocolate
without being called nasty names.

9. The word “commitment” doesn’t scare off
chocolate.

10. You can have chocolate on top of your
workbench/desk during working hours without
upsetting your work mates.

11. You can ask a stranger for chocolate without
getting your face slapped.

12. You don’t get hairs in your mouth with
chocolate.

13. With chocolate there’s no need to fake it.

14. Chocolate doesn’t make you pregnant.

15. You can have chocolate at any time of the
month.

16. Good chocolate is easy to find.

17. You can have as many kinds of chocolate as
you can handle.

18. You are never too young or too old for
chocolate.

19. When you have chocolate it does not keep
your neighbors awake.

20. With chocolate size doesn’t matter; it’s always
good.

August 08, 2005

Uninspiration

Holidays for me are not exactly the time that I use to catch up with old friends, check out new hangouts. I do those, in actual fact, during the school term, which probably explains the ever dipping grades. But I'm here in college, bumming free internet (wait, there's a RM500 resource free right? capitalists) and whiling away the time before I return some books and head back home to Buffy reruns. I do want to see my friends though, but the problem with being holed up for more than a week at home is that you tend to shun people even more, I guess because I'm used to lack of social activity and all that. Plus my best friend is in bed with a haze flu and hey, butter cream chicken ain't the same without you, buddy. And being in.. intense like with a certain clueless someone without him knowing really bites, though his horoscope seems to be pointing him in the right direction (I was gonna go on and on on this whole dissection of my love life, but the school is closing in 5 hours). A fuck buddy would go a long way too, but JD Fortune is in LA :D But I digress. I discovered something through all this: the only thing worse than having bad-weather friends who only look you up when things are shite is having a lack of good-weather friends who want to share their day-to-day with you. Makes you feel... I don't know. 'Unappreciated' wasn't the word I was looking for, but that will have to do for now. Hence why I love going to the animal shelter these days. The unconditional canine love makes me happy :)

Oh, and I finally got my spiffy new glasses & sunglasses. Giving me a helluva headache though, this astigmatisme thing is painful. What's the plural for glasses, anyway? Glasseses? Glassess?